I manage to reach office and meet my teammates and both of them seem nice enough. The security here is unbelievable. I have 3 layers of physical access and to boot my computer I have to enter 2 passwords. By the time I am done here I will be thru with a lot of my lazy habits (like not carrying my id, wallet, phones etc).
I nod politely and seem thoughtful to most of the technical downloads which I receive from my team mates while understanding none of it, twice nodding when actually I was asked a question. I apply the necessary GSDs and wait for the day to end.
The floor has a breathtaking view of Kolkata from my floor. The skyline is absolutely devoid of any buildings and I can actually see Howrah bridge from the floor whereas actually it’s a good 30-40 KMs fom here. As the grey clouds roll in from the horizon it brings a strange kind of darkness despite the full illumination on our floor. Rolls and rolls of rain clouds tumble and jostle and spurt forward with streaks of lightening like streaking thru the grey waves. The entire floor has a glass front and I can see nothing but clouds as far as I can see. It’s like watching discovery channel specials on mute. It’s mesmerizing to see. I reluctantly peal my eyes away when I am summoned to get my PC fixed. I pick up my phone and snap pictures of the spectacle. I turn back to see absolute horror of those around me and the IT girl looks at me like I have just taken off my clothes and was doing an Zulu dance. Sanghamitra (my team mate) tut tuts and lets me know that Cams are not allowed really and are not to be used. She points to the no photography sign on the floor.
I sheepishly slipped the phone back but I resolve quietly that they would have to better break my hands before they even think of deleting those pics. The girl from IT is still staring at me. I suddenly have an overpowering urge to stick my pencil right up her nose. That brings a smile (one of those ones!) on my face and she is infuriated further.
I turn and present my butt to her and return to the spectacle in front. And strangely I am at peace, again…
This is one of the mysteries I haven’t been able to solve in my life apart from my specs which disappeared one fine day and why Vishy’s bike used to break down just when we couldn’t afford it to. While others feel morose and some hate the phenomena I never had issues with it. I remember driving my mother mad with my mud stained dresses caused by jumping into every possible puddle on my way to school. I don’t mind getting wet.
One thing different about me from normal sane people is the capacity to remain alone for unimaginable periods and one of my favorite activities was sitting on Z bridge in Pune along other evening revelers, mostly couples and oldies during my lonely evenings. I remember once when it started raining (those beautiful sudden unexpected Pune showers) people started hurrying off. I don’t know what came over me, but somehow I kept my butt planted. For a while I was the only one on the bridge with people staring with emotions ranging from plane incredulity, surprise to mild derision. In some time I was totally lost and looking at the lightning flashes on the horizon somewhere far down the horizon with the rain gently falling down. Gradually, first a gang of giggling girls, then some couples actually came over back and sat on the bridge. After 10-15 minutes half of the original populace was back on the bridge from the tiny encampment meant to serve as a bus stop. All soaking in the rain…
Some time people forget the simple joys of feeling the rain falling on the skin and really drenching you down. For me rain has the power to clear the mental cobwebs and somehow make me carefree. That’s when I am dangerously close to getting out of control. My friends have had the pain of bearing with me on these moments. I still remember screaming my favorite songs while Vishy/ Niru/ Sameer drove on their bikes carrying me along possibly embarrassed. I was difficult to reason with and I don’t think I remember even if they complained. I never intentionally did it. It just that I used to go cranky at the first hint of gray…
I have sobered since then, matured in the eyes of my world, friends and parents. But the scene which I was a part of in office was special. Its funny how small events can bring all your memories swirling in a matter of moments….Like a giant flash flood.. Memories you never even thought existed. Memories you never attached any importance to or considered worthwhile enough to store and archive… And suddenly you remember how peaceful you were then and how peaceful you are right now. For me this is happiness, bliss and all that is good in this world.
It rains here a lot.
I am beginning to like Kolkata….
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